crimson and clover

1) Curious events yesterday. A takeout place we order from every other month or so couldn't be reached. Its website was not working over a half hour period. I looked up their number and at least 3 other sites listed the same one. Called it and was told it was not a valid number. Since I wanted more oranges, I figured I'd stop by to see if the restaurant had closed down.

Nope. They seemed completely unconcerned the website was down, and told me I'd used the wrong number (also seeming completely unconcerned a wrong one is widely available!) But at least we are not down yet another restaurant.

2) Got many yummy oranges but this store sells them by count not by weight. So I picked all the largest oranges I could and I swear some of these are bigger than both fists.

3) Nesting time for ducks is great for all the adorable little fluffs we will be seeing soon. It is definitely not so when we have to keep watching drakes attacking the female ducks. This week there was one poor female attacked simultaneously and sequentially by 5 drakes. She was finally able to get out of the lake (I felt half sure she had drowned) and one followed her and kept attacking her on land, which was the first time I'd seen that happen.

4) Was watching Life of Chuck and can I say I am incredibly tired of the romantic convention of looking at stars together and (usually the man) pointing out the constellations to the person they are wooing. Come up with something else!

That said, it was a nice little film. ( Read more... )

5) Belatedly I was not impressed with the Oscars. I was glad there were only 2 of the nominated songs sung and that there was no opening number, but I also would have preferred to skip that whole pre-filmed Conan bit and just have a very strong monologue (which I didn't think it was). ( Read more... )

1) I wrote last year about the movie The Big Year, which was about birders trying to break a record in seeing the most birds that year. When I told my partner I was trying to pass 1000 wins at Solo on BGA he said, "So this is your Big Year." ( Read more... )

2) I confess I don't really follow the Oscars race or even nominees since I only see movies once in a while and usually well after they've been released, but I thought this was an interesting summation. I was particularly struck by the discussion of costs, and how chasing Oscar prestige outranks movie ticket sales, since so many potential contenders crowd into the end of year period. This almost guarantees many people will miss a number of them.

What was interesting about this survey is the data on how people have changed their opinions of last year's Oscar nominees. "Americans are much more likely now than they were last year to say they love "A Complete Unknown" (51%, up from 39%). They’re less likely to say they love "Dune: Part 2" (43%, down from 53%)."

3) On the same day in which NPR's 1A did a show on the value of acknowledging mistakes, someone also posted about The Ctrl-Z Award’ to honor researchers who correct the scientific record. This latter seems like a much needed antidote to our times (and can also be immeasurably helpful). I hope it does well.

RE: the 1A episode, here's a quote: "So, you know, theoretically, you could make a decision that was the wrong decision, but if it doesn't have a bad outcome, you're not even judging it as a mistake half the time. And that that's actually potentially the difference between a little mistake and a big mistake...we talk about this three act structure, what happened before the mistake, the mistake itself, and then how we deal with the mistake thereafter...It's not the crime. It's the cover up. Right? And that's an act three problem. But because people haven't gone through the process of saying, okay, what actually happened in act one, act two, and and now how am I gonna deal with it in act three? They make an even bigger one."

The fear of error is also talked about here: "what I see in the therapy room is sometimes it can take folks a while to really come around to admit to themselves actually that a mistake even happened because there's so much shame. It gets kind of locked up because as we've been discussing, as a culture, we do a terrible job of admitting to ourselves and to others that mistakes actually are how you learn. And so we get have so much shame that's wrapped up in it. And from that end, when there's shame, depression, anxiety, trauma, you know, are not far behind. So talking through mistakes, processing mistakes, learning not to avoid coming around to kind of, unpacking the Russian doll, if we stick with that metaphor, that's a huge piece of therapy." I can really recommend reading the episode transcript (you can also listen to the show).

4) What these incidents made me think of was fear on the Internet. "One of the phrases we like is curious, not furious. And so whether you're thinking about yourself, oh, I'm so angry at myself. Why did I do this? Or you see someone else make a mistake and you're kind of angry that they did it. The more that you can use curiosity as opposed to anger, I think we would all get along a little better. And then to your point, it's so helpful to talk with someone else. We believe you have to talk your mistakes to death. And it's helpful to write about them, sure, if you really don't have anyone with whom you can speak."( Read more... )

5) And speaking of mistakes, it's nice to have unexpected support even when you make them. ( Read more... )